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Lori Interviews Amanda

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“Powdered Cheese Products”

It’s the last week of the month, and that means it’s time for the second edition of “Lori Interviews…” (Read my interview with Allyssa here.) This month we talk to Amanda Meys. As many of our conversations tend to do, this one digressed into random inside joke references. Many of them were cut out to make this somewhat coherent, but there’s still some in there. After all, it wouldn’t be a conversation between Amanda and me without at least one mention of Oprah gaining 30 pounds or hippos, bitch. My advice to you? Don’t ask questions, just go with it. And enjoy.

Amanda: Let’s get ready to ruuuuummmblllleeeeeeeee.

Lori: I guess the most important place for us to begin would be with fish.

Amanda: Naturally.

Lori: How are your little buddies doing?

Amanda: Well, I have 3 left. Joon died a peaceful death, which I imagine to be of old age. And Tetris, I believe, tried to pick a fight with Ziggy and lost.

Lori: Are you getting any new ones?

Amanda: I will be as soon as I get paid. I want to get tiger barbs.

Lori: Let’s move on to my favorite topic: food. If you could only eat one food every day for the rest of your life, what would it be?

Amanda: Pizza or pasta. Oh or muffins. Mmmm…muffins.

Lori: OK so you know I have to ask… how are you feeling about Game of Thrones right now?

Amanda: Well….WHERE THE FUCK IS BOOK 6. I actually said that out loud.

Lori: Are you still crying about the Red Wedding? Because I actually thought there was a chance I’d get murdered at the wedding I went to on Saturday.

Amanda: No…I was so much more depressed as I read it….even though I knew it was going to happen because people on the internet don’t like to warn you about spoilers.

Which one are you?

Which one are you?

Lori: Yeah, the internet is my best friend and worst enemy.

Amanda: I wholeheartedly agree with that statement.

Lori: I think we should move on to a less upsetting topic…which Spice Girl are you?

Amanda: Growing up I am pretty sure I liked to think of myself as Sporty Spice, but I don’t really play sports anymore, so maybe not now? Maybe I would be like Scary Spice or something. I get pretty scary when I don’t eat. Or when I wake up in the morning

Lori: Who is the hottest Disney prince?

Amanda: Oh, definitely Prince Eric. I mean, those blue eyes…and the cute dog.

Dreamy.

Dreamy.

Lori: He’s got good hair too.

Amanda: He really does.

Lori: I feel like I have to ask everyone these questions…who is your Mario Kart character of choice?

Amanda: Yoshi all day erryday.

Lori: And what’s your Patronus?

Amanda: Oh I hope it would be a wolf.

Lori: Direwolf?

Amanda: YES

Lori: OK, so the world is dying to know… who is the best animated monkey…Abu, Steve, Curious George or Donkey Kong?

Amanda: Steeeeevveeeeeeeee. STEVE!

Lori: Has Oprah gained any weight recently?

Amanda: 30lbs. She decided that she needed to take a moment and Oprahgate that sitch.

Lori: I just laughed so hard at a joke that I set up and no one else will even understand.

Amanda: I am literally laughing so hard my stomach hurts.

Lori: I laughed so hard my cat got mad and left the room…Maybe we should talk about something other people would actually understand. Why don’t you tell the world what your very first impression of me was? I always enjoy that story

Amanda: Well….I thought you were dating someone on our floor…what was that, the second day of college?

Lori: All I’m saying is…can’t a girl sit in a boy’s bunk bed and color him a picture without people getting all weird about it?

Amanda: The answer is….no.

Lori: Well, my first impression of you was that you would do anything the guys asked…like make Easy Mac for a certain ginger floormate of ours just because he wanted it…

Amanda: Oh, Easy Mac. I haven’t had that since school.

College.

College.

Lori: Possibly the worst of all the powdered cheese products. Are you ready to play the word association game?

Amanda: Yes

Lori: Hot chocolate

Amanda: Wintertime

Lori: Giraffe

Amanda: Neck

Lori: Robb Stark

RIP <3

RIP ❤

Amanda: Don’t make me do it.

Lori: Do it.

Amanda: DEEEEAAAAAAADDDDDDDDD…SPOILER ALERT.

Lori: Stop. I’m going to throw up from laughing. And also crying.

Amanda: That just made me lol.

Lori: Woo. OK. Dominos.

Amanda: Vomit.

Lori: Florida

Amanda: Harry Potter. Harry Potter.

Bros love Harry Potter.

Bros love Harry Potter.

Lori: Lori

Amanda: Jesus 

Lori: Allyssa

Amanda: Wife

Lori: Rachel

Amanda: RACK ATTACK

Lori: Kaely

Amanda: Taely flaps

Lori: Hippo

Amanda: Bitch

Lori: I was hoping you would say that. OK, more questions. What’s your favorite word?

Amanda: Play

Lori: What’s your favorite crayon?

Amanda: Cerulean

Lori: What’s the number 1 most played song on your iTunes?

Amanda: Everlasting Light by the Black Keys

Lori: I guess really the only thing left to ask is if you have any last words of honesty to impart on the world?

Amanda: Never be afraid of trying new things. I myself have been more adventurous lately…in food choices.

Lori: Today I tried a mushroom. That’s not new but I hate mushrooms and I tried it anyway just to make sure I still hate them…I do.

Amanda: I have recently tried clam chowder. And hummus. And Chulula. And burritos.

Lori: You’ve never had a burrito?! I never knew that about you. I’m not sure why I would have.

Amanda: I liked it

Lori: I guess we all learned something today. Mostly that things that happened 6 years ago still make us laugh just as hard today as they did then, and burritos are delicious.

Read more from Amanda here.

 

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Author: Lori

Lori is a writer living and working in New Jersey. Her greatest literary influences are Dr. Seuss, JK Rowling, and Harriet the Spy.

7 thoughts on “Lori Interviews Amanda

  1. I just laughed so hard. Also, Amanda, if you hadn’t said Steve was your favorite monkey, we would no longer be friends. Also… laughing at the story of who people thought Lori was dating. But also crying.

  2. Now thats one game I should try out!

  3. I just love all of this.

  4. I laughed out loud, in public, at Oprah gains 30lbs. I’m actually still laughing.

  5. Pingback: Lori Interviews Kaely | Honesty Time

  6. Pingback: Lori Interviews Rachel | Honesty Time

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