Honesty Time

Keeping it real since 2013

Haikus, Take Two.


Remember the time
When I wrote haikus all day?
Let’s do it again.

Dear Polar Vortex,
Please go away. I’m so cold.
Going outside hurts.

It is so quiet.
All I hear is “type, type, type.”
The sound of boredom.

Dear Goldfish Crackers,
I want to eat you all day.
Sincerely, I’m Fat.

Got new highlighters.
They make my day happier.
It’s the little things.

I called Haiku Five,
Haiku Three, by accident.
I can’t math real good.

I hear someone say:
“It looked like a drip of blood.”
You’re a vampire.

Instead of your kids,
Talk about something more fun.
How about my fish?

These haikus are bad.
Too tired to be clever,
And my feet are cold.

Always think of me
As a lover of pizza
And also cookies.

Want to be a cat?
Cause a cat’s the only cat
Who knows where it’s at.

Haiku Eleven,
Ode to The Aristocats’
Song stuck in my head.

My motto for life:
Never too cold for ice cream.
I might eat too much.

I wrote all these haikus
In less than 90 minutes.
Time to do some work?


Author: Lori

Lori is a writer living and working in New Jersey. Her greatest literary influences are Dr. Seuss, JK Rowling, and Harriet the Spy.

2 thoughts on “Haikus, Take Two.

  1. “Sincerely, I’m fat.” ❤ I don't think you're fat, but I can relate to wanting to eat a lot of goldfish crackers… and also ice cream, even though that was too many syllables and had to be put into its own haiku.

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